L'homme nouveau
Par Dédé Nypleut le vendredi 18 novembre 2005, 14:33 - Moi - Lien permanent
Vous, vous êtes (ou "Et le votre, il est") macho, metrosexuel ou übersexuel ?
Moi, quand j'étais petit, les hommes, c'étaient des vrais hommes, quand la femme bronchait, l'homme faisait les gros yeux, et elle retournait dans sa cuisine. Les petites filles jouaient à la poupée et les garçons au foot ou au train électrique.
La femme était féminine et l'homme "un peu" macho, mais ça ne l'empêchait pas, quand les yeux de sa femme devenaient quelque peu humides, de sortir les biscottos de son marcel, et de protéger sa moitié !
Ah ! C'était le bon temps !
Puis, on a fait, enfin ELLES ont fait la libération féminine, elles ont jetés leur soutien-gorge par dessus leur tête ! Mais, pas longtemps, quand elles ont vu que leur poitrine tombait, elles ont vite fait de le remettre !!!
Mais, le beau machisme en avait pris un coup, alors, les mecs se sont mis à faire la vaisselle, à briquer le parquet, éplucher les carottes, mettre le linge dans la machine à laver, torcher le petit dernier, etc... La liste est infinie et variable...
Ils ont tellement pris l'habitude de faire comme leur femme (d'un seul coup, je me demande si je ne fais pas une faute d'orthographe, si je ne devrais pas mettre leurs femmes), qu'ils sont arrivés à se tartiner le visage de produits de beauté, de se teindre les cheveux, et même de mettre des jupes !
C'était donc, les premiers symptômes du « Métrosexuel » (voir la définition donnée par Wikipedia), en version original (américain, ça va de soi) « metropolitan sexual ». Celui qui prend grand soin de sa personne : qui surveille son poids, son alimentation, sa santé, sa peau, et court les magasins. Aucun doute à avoir sur sa virilité : ces hommes ont pour modèle le footballeur David Beckham emblème d'une nouvelle génération où les codes de la séduction classique basculent. Le narcissisme n'est plus considéré comme une démarche esthétique homo mais comme une virilité hétérosexuelle !
"Les hommes s'épilent, se musclent, se parfument et se réinventent. La consommation se conjugue plus que jamais au masculin" selon Babeth Djian. Un phénomène marketing inespéré qui peut doper la consommation et faire bouger les mentalités !
Mais, le métrosexuel que l’on croyait pourvu de « qualités féminines » parait soudain bourré de défauts : égoïste, narcissique, maniéré, lâche... Sa « féminité » s’arrêterait donc à sa garde-robe et à sa manie de se regarder dans le miroir toute la journée ?
Donc, les « métrosexuels » n’ont plus du tout la côte à en croire le dernier ouvrage de Marian Salzman, la publicitaire à l’origine du terme, elle essaye de nous vendre un nouveau mot, l'homme « übersexuel ».
Moi, en lisant le mot, (j'ai vécu en Allemagne quelques temps, mais je n'ai plus qu'un vague souvenir de la langue) "über" veut dire "au-dessus de", et sexuel, je sais. Donc, j'en avais conclu que übersexuel, c'était celui qui plaçait son cerveau au-dessus de ses parties génitales. Et bien non, la vraie définition c'est :
« L’übersexuel, c’est l’alter ego de la femme moderne : comme elle est forte et sûre d’elle, elle a besoin d’un homme fort (pas d’une serpillère émotive). L’übersexuel est donc masculin (mais pas macho), sûr de lui (mais pas obnubilé par sa personne), stylé (ce qui lui donne du caractère, forcément). Par rapport au métrosexuel, il est plus ancré dans la relation aux autres (et moins sur lui-même). Il a son style, mais n’est pas une gravure de mode. »
Si vous voir les autres définitions de Ûbersexuel en anglais.
Salzman cite un exemple : George Clooney. (pour ma part, je me demande si je n'ai pas trouvé là ma définition, car, depuis quelques temps comme Clooney, j'ai les cheveux qui blanchissent...)
Elle parle aussi de « M-ness » (maleness), la mâle attitude : une masculinité qui combine le meilleur de l’homme (force, sens de l’honneur, caractère) et les traits positifs généralement associés à la femme (maternité, communication, entraide). (oui, pour ma part, je me demande si...)
Les nouveaux idéaux masculins se réjouissent de la parité, n’ont pas peur de s’engager et s’investissent même dans l’éducation des enfants !
Mais, j'entends déjà certaines d'entre vous qui me disent: "En dehors de Georges Clooney, est-ce que ça existe vraiment ?" Et bien, oui ! Vous en trouverez à tous les coins de rues, et les articles parlant du sujet de citer : "Guy Richie, l'époux de Madonna, qui représente le type même de l’« übersexuel » : il aime les films de mafieux, la bière et le foot, mais il n’en est pas moins un père dévoué et attentionné, sans oublier que le fait que sa femme gagne beaucoup plus d’argent que lui ne semble pas lui poser de problème." Et il y aurait aussi: "Brad Pitt, Vincent Cassel, Bill Clinton, Philippe Torreton, François Hollande (sic)... Soit des hommes qui valorisent les femmes et acceptent leur autonomie nouvelle."
Je ne sais pas ce qu'on va nous inventer demain, mais pour l'instant, appelez-moi Hubert, tout simplement !
Nypleusement votre.
Hubert
PS: Il y a aussi les rétrosexuels
Ils sont un peu plus âgés : entre 40 et 60 ans. Ils ne passent plus leur temps devant la glace à se pomponner, ils sont beaucoup plus nature. Leur charme, vient de leur maturité, pas de leur côté sophistiqué. En gros, contrairement au métrosexuel, les rétrosexuels n’ont pas besoin de se la jouer pour impressionner, ils impressionnent tout court, ou plutôt ils assurent, parce qu’évidemment ils ont de l’expérience.
A la maison, ils assurent, ils savent bricoler et gérer les petits problèmes. Ils se débrouillent aussi très bien avec les enfants. Ensuite au lit, là non plus, ils n’ont pas besoin de faire croire qu’ils sont les meilleurs du monde, mais ils savent tout simplement comment s’y prendre, l’expérience aidant. Les rétrosexuels sont galants, savent parler en société, sans se faire remarquer. Ils seront amis à la fois avec les enfants de leur compagne et leurs beaux parents. Ils écoutent aussi bien de la musique classique que du bon vieux rock des années 70.
Alors là, j'ai un vieux doute, ils citent comme exemple type de ce qu’est un rétrosexuel : Richard Gere.
Bon, là, j'ai les cheveux qui blanchissent de plus en plus, mais j'en suis pas encore là... Puis, le fait de s'appeler "rétro", ça grille définitivement auprès des moins de 40 ans...
Commentaires
Les hommes ne demandent pas aux femmes d’agir comme des hommes. En général les hommes acceptent les femmes telles qu’elles sont. Quand aux femmes, elles ont tendance à vouloir changer leur homme. Mais voilà, les hommes ne se retrouvent plus et les femmes instinctivement cherchent chez lui, une masculinité perdue. Les femmes ne peuvent pas avoir les deux. Suivant l’humeur du moment un macho un jour et un homme rose l’autre jour. Si bien que nous vivons des relations contre nature. L’homme n’est pas bien dans sa peau et la femme n’est pas heureuse.
Parce que les hommes sont en général prévisibles. À tort les femmes pensent les connaître. Les hommes gardent beaucoup à l’intérieur et souvent achètent la paix avec le silence. Tout le problème vient de l’égalité entre l’homme et la femme. Devant la loi oui. Mais une femme a des attributs qui lui sont propres et l’homme de même. Alors comment peut-on parler d’égalité ? La nature nous enseigne le contraire. Autre chose, il ne faut pas confondre égalité avec supériorité. Le rôle de l’homme et de la femme est différent et complémentaire.
L’homme ne peu pas remplacer le rôle d’une mère surtout pour des enfants de bas âges. Par contre, l’homme est plus logique et c’est plus naturel chez lui d’occuper le rôle de chef de famille. Toute organisation à un chef. Si non c’est une poule sans tête. Un coq dans la bassecour deux c’est la guerre!
Non, non et non pas question de me pomponner ! Pas question de me féminiser ! Si je n’ai pas envie de me raser un certain jour bien tant pis pour les autres. Si je ne sort pas, j’enfile mon vieux ‘jeans’ confortable et j’écoute le football canadien ou le hockey. La mode je m’en contre balance et je refuse d’en être un esclave. D’ailleurs c’est souvent inspiré par des homosexuels et je ne m’y retrouve pas. Pas de ‘Danse music ou du disco’ moi c’est du viril, du bon vieux ROCK ! La propreté oui mais une lotion pour ceci une autre pour cela… me raser les aisselles… une boucle d’oreille avec ça ?... jamais de la vie ! Je n’impose pas une coiffure particulière ni un parfum à mon épouse. Je respect son côté féminin et je suis heureux quelle respecte mon côté masculin.
"Par contre, l’homme est plus logique et c’est plus naturel chez lui d’occuper le rôle de chef de famille."
Ah bon?
"L’homme ne peu pas remplacer le rôle d’une mère surtout pour des enfants de bas âges"
Et pourquoi, SVP?
"L’homme n’est pas bien dans sa peau et la femme n’est pas heureuse."
Parlez pour vous
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